Cursing In A Foreign Language

I like to curse. I think it might have to do with the forbidden fruit tasting sweeter or maybe because sometimes the only thing left is to drop an F-bomb. I curse like a sailor with friends (And on here. We're friends, right?) but I understand there is a time a place. I'm not an idiot. I work with kids every day of the week and I know I can't shout expletives. I know when I'm with relatives or in school or in the grocery store I can't say "It's so fucking cold" when talking about the weather and I'm standing in front of a priest. I have a pretty good understanding of when and where certain language and behaviors are acceptable. That being said, I may have accidentally insulted some foreigners.

Nothing as bad as him. It takes a lot of skill to insult an entire country. I just made a small snafoo.

Some background information first: my church is hosting some students in a choir from a boarding school in England and my family is hosting two of the students. we have a brother and a sister, aged 16 and 11 respectively and so far everything has been pretty awesome. Lots of timidity on both our parts but I have come to find that there isn't all that much different between the youth of England and the youth of America. So it's been pretty awesome. You know, one of those once in a lifetime experiences. Except I may have wasted a lot of the experience because they are out doing choir things during the day and my semester is over so I have the obligation to sleep until noon.

Dramatization

Now that you know why I would have the opportunity to insult foreigners, allow me to set the stage for the offending situation. My parents were at an office party and apparently a twenty-year-old that is certified in CPR and First Aid courses and who watches children for a living is not qualified to watch two well-behaved students in her own home. So, my friend Mary had to come hang out for a bit because she is awesome, as has been discussed before. Also, she's 21. You know, the legal drinking age in America. I, however, can't buy alcohol and am professionally qualified to watch children but I'm not allowed to stay in my home and watch these two pretty low-key kids (I may still be a little pissed off). Anyhoo, to pass the time we played a couple of board games. We learned that Clue is in fact Clue-do in England and that if you play Life with two British children, they will instinctively put the "drivers" on the right, which I thought was pretty funny but I kept it to myself so I wouldn't look like an idiot. I had opportunity enough later. 

This is what my guilty conscience looks like.

So, there we are playing Life, the four of us innocent and carefree as can be. I was winning, which was cool because Mary is kind of cut-throat about most things and she had already won Clue, so I was feeling great. Mary was the banker and I don't recall what for, but I asked for two of something from her. And each time I did this, I would hold up my hands and show on my fingers how many I was asking for. I did what I usually do out of habit when asking for two of something, but it translates into the most offensive hand gesture you can make in Great Britain. That's right, the two-finger salute. Our equivalent of flipping the bird. I flipped off an eleven-year-old British child. Twice. 

Not nearly as handsome as this, either.

It was an honest mistake, I swear. To be honest, though, it would end up being me doing something so stupid as that. I don't think she caught it either because I was really quick about it, but it would be my luck that poor child really does think I said "fuck you" straight to her face on two different occasions. Mostly because I was the one who told my sister not to embarrass me because we are essentially representing our country. Whoever is in charge of irony was listening in on that. I just thought I would let you know that I happened to greatly offend a visitor to our country so you have someone to blame when you hear that Americans are rude. 

Then again....